Sep 13, 2019
A highly unhelpful guide to the Semi Finals
The only guide to the round that admits it’s completely unhelpful. What it lacks in insight, it makes up for with wild theories and detours onto unrelated topics.
It’s your unhelpful guide to the Semi Finals.
Geelong vs West Coast (MCG) Seven & Fox 7:50pm
Out: Willie Rioli
In: An “adverse analytical finding for urine substitution”.
If there’s one thing you never want, it’s a player from your team and the word ‘urine’ in the same story.
Todd Carney told me that.
We’ve no idea of Willie Rioli’s innocence or guilt yet, the one thing I can tell you, is urine substitution is a messy business.
How will this affect the Eagles? Will it send them over the edge? Or will it galvanise them?
Last year they had Andrew Gaff’s suspension, now this. Is this now an annual event?
If they win a Premiership again this year they may take this approach every year.
It’s possibly the best news Geelong have had in a while and certainly distracted the media from the ‘can Geelong win a finals’ narrative.
Chris Scott had senior players coming to his defence this week, never something you want. You get the board doing the same and you’re toast.
A loss here and the board could be rushing to offer Chris their support. If Chris Scott gets sacked, the AFL could be Scott-free. Thanks, here all week.
I think Geelong are just not quite up to the level needed for the finals. I could be wrong this week but not the next.
Eagles to win.
Brisbane vs Greater Western Sydney (G) Seven & Fox 7:25pm
Being based in Melbourne, I’d forgotten this game was happening until I sat down to write this. A second semi-final! Why didn’t they tell us?
Brisbane’s exciting journey to an unlikely to premiership has hit a roadblock, Richmond.
It’s taken a fair bit of momentum out of the Lions and the question is, can they find it again?
I’ve always found the best way to rediscover your confidence is to drink heavily but I’ve been told that doesn’t work that well for professional athletes, another reason I’m glad my ability prevented such an outcome.
Given Brisbane’s storming finish to the season, a straight sets exit would be an incredibly disappointing finish.
It’s going to be interesting to see how the Giants midfield goes against Brisbane’s midfield or as I like to call it, ‘Lachie Neale’.
The Giants’ chances were boosted this week after the AFL legalised eye gouging. What a wonderful thing. This reminds me of the early WWF 80s where a good eye gouging was all part of the fun.
It’s amazing Toby Greene got off, especially given his rather insane tribunal record. Greene plays ‘close to the edge’, which is code for someone who ‘regularly does thuggish things.’
Some see Greene getting off as the AFL wanting the Giants to win, but the AFL doesn’t want the Giants to win, they want to be able to sell tickets to the finals.
Brisbane to win.
Titus has shows coming up in Hobart and Brisbane. Tickets available here: http://www.frontiercomedy.com/titusoreily
Titus’ new book Please, Gamble Irresponsibly: The rise, fall and rise of sport gambling in Australia will be out on 5th November 2019. You can pre-order it now.