Aug 01, 2020


AFL Hub Daily Timetable


The AFL hubs have been under the microscope in recent weeks. To show the AFL is taking its COVID responsibilities seriously, they have released the timetable those within the hub follow.

7-8am- Breakfast

8am- Eddie McGuire, as self-appointed spokesperson for the AFL, will address all personnel on the need to maintain strict adherence to the AFL’s COVID-19 protocols and outlines the penalties and how there will be no exceptions.

10.00am- Eddie stops talking when AFL staff flick the lights on and off

10:15am- Carlton’s family bus to head to nearby theme parks

10:05- Tennis with Australian Fed Cup captain Alicia Molik

10:30- Shuttle leaves hub for spa retreat and shopping

12pm- Lunch

1pm- Players to record social media videos for fans back in Melbourne about how we are all in this together.

2pm- Armaguard vans arrive to take away the yesterday’s fines for breaching COVID regulations.

6pm- Gather in the conference room to hear Eddie to launch a furious defence of any Collingwood players or officials who have broken COVID-19 protocols that day and explain why these are exceptions to what he outlined that morning. Ends with emotional moment about how proud he is of them.

6:15- Hawks players to duck out of Eddie’s speech to get some food outside the hub.

7:30- Steele Sidebottom bar opens. Strick dress code, clothes required. Note: use the door to the left, the one on the right leads outside.

9:30pm onwards- Tinder dates arrive

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Scott Warnes

Aug 02, 2020

Love your work. I’m a Crows fan so I now understand the pain you have felt being a Dees supporter

Max Powa

Aug 02, 2020

Love it, the only thing missing is the Clarkson daily umpiring school.


Aug 02, 2020

Scott Warnes. You are *many* years off knowing the pain of Dees supporters!


Aug 02, 2020

Do you mean “Eddie, Do as a say, Not Do as I Do, McGuire”?

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