Aug 03, 2020

AFL

AFL Mad Scramble: Day Six

15 Comments

A column every day for twenty days, as we get more football than we even asked for.

Occasionally, this column will even mention football but rarely sensibly.

Last Night

Gold Coast (35) v Greater Western Sydney (61)

I’m writing this in Melbourne, so I’m typing very quietly so as to not get in trouble.

Yesterday’s announcement felt like a kick in the guts. I can honestly say that I haven’t felt this flat since I started following the Melbourne Football Club back when I was born.

2020 has been such a disaster and gone on so long that from the bushfires and the lockdown, I can now understand sign language. It is usually just someone signalling ‘we’re all rooted’ over and over again.

Spare a thought for us Victorians, who contrary to popular belief have in the main being doing the right thing, I can tell you numerous stories of people who have done the right thing all year are now really struggling mentally.

And I’ve never believed there’s as big a difference between Victorians and the rest of Australia, I’ve travelled too much to know the percentages of good people and idiots remain vastly similar wherever you go.

The idea that Victorians have been careless, and the rest of the country’s population has been as pure as the driven snow is ludicrous.

Every strategy has to factor in idiots being idiots, not be constantly surprised by them. Can you believe 1 in 4 people weren’t home when they were meant to be? Yeah, I can totally believe it. What are we doing about that?

For the vast majority, we’ve done the right thing and are still paying for it, while we watch people in other states have lives, something I don’t begrudge them, I hope no other state goes through what we’re going through.

You can argue the politics of it until your blue in the face and with increasingly hardened left/right positions (that’s what Twitter is for), but this singular fact is that every other state has avoided this, and Victoria hasn’t, can’t be avoided.

It’s is orders of magnitude worse here.

That all said, I have faith Victorian’s can get through this lockdown. And the next one, and the one after that. It’s the August 2021 lockdown I’m concerned about.

As for this game, coming as the announcement of curfews and other fun things were being announced, it was fine, I guess.

Gold Coast are showing that they are an average side, which is a big step up on previous years, but the enthusiasm for them from earlier in the year has waned somewhat.

The Giants had Toby Greene go off with a hamstring injury, but it didn’t really matter, they controlled the game in its entirety and are now back in the eight.

If the Grand Final is held outside Victoria and the Giants win the premiership, that might be it for Victoria, I don’t think they’ll handle it.

Fremantle (61) v Collingwood (49)

Collingwood had a week to forget both on the field and off.

With no less than their senior coach breaching COVID regulations, and his President adopting his traditional foot in mouth position, a win here would have been just the tonic they needed.

Eddie McGuire defended himself this morning saying people had “misconstrued” his position on how people should be penalised for COVID breaches by accurately quoting him.

Good to have that sorted out.

As for the game, Fremantle surprised even themselves by beating the Pies, in large part due to accurate goal kicking, booting 10.1 to Collingwood’s 7.7.

I’ve mentioned this multiple times, but accurate goal kicking is a huge factor in winning, the only reason it is often ignored is because the other side kicks just as badly.

For the Pies, Steele Sidebottom showed he is a much better footballer than identifier of correct doors.

He kept them in this for long period, but the Dockers just applied too much pressure and the Pies made too many mistakes.

It gives a bit of hope to Dockers fans. That’s the problem with footy, just as you’re getting sick of it, it gives you a reason to believe again. It’s a cruel game.

Today

Port Adelaide v Western Bulldogs (AO) 7:10pm

This match is the beginning of Round Ten, not that rounds seem to mean much anymore, they’re like days of the week in that regard.

It’s Monday by the way if you’re interested and I understand if you aren’t.

Days are redundant at the moment for Victorians, they’re like star signs, you know the names of them all, but they don’t have any actual impact on your life.

The Bulldogs are coming off a loss to Richmond, which really showed them up, and now they face the Power at home.

It’s another tough test for them, and Port Adelaide haven’t had to play a game since the 25th of July against St Kilda, a long break.

I can’t see the Bulldogs beating Port, they’re too inconsistent, although Luke Beveridge has dropped three players, and that was him being kind.

This might be Port’s year, they’re certainly in this. In fact, it might be the most fun Port fans have had in years.

They can leave the house, they’ve trolled Eddie all year and the Crows are such a shambles it’s exceed even the wildest dreams of a Port Adelaide supporter.

Port to win.

On a final note, hang in there Victorians, as a Melbourne supporter, I can tell you, no matter how low things get, things always turnaround. 

At the moment I’m barely able to work, so you can help support me in producing this ridiculous nonsense I churn out on a regular basis. It’s greatly appreciated. Find out more here: https://titusoreily.com/support-titus

COMMENTS

Train

Aug 03, 2020

“It’s another tough test for them, and Port Adelaide haven’t had to play a game since the 25th of July against St Kilda, a long break”.

Someone who doesn’t understand your brand of humour might be tempted to correct you. Nice work.

Gyfox

Aug 03, 2020

Is it really Monday, Titus? Are you sure?

Nicole

Aug 03, 2020

Hang in there mate, there's still footy to watch. Turn that frown upside down. And other trite comments that aren't helpful. Strength to all you Victorians.

Helen

Aug 03, 2020

“Trite comments????”..... Titus and “Humans of Melbourne“ make more sense than all the overpaid politicians and Social Media losers.

Fat Side

Aug 03, 2020

Surely we could return things to normal if the government would just do the same magic on the Covid numbers that they have been doing for years on the unemployment figures.

Borissimo

Aug 03, 2020

In these uncertain times, one thing is a certainty : Eddie McMouth's footskills
Hang in there Melburnians.

Ralph

Aug 03, 2020

"Days are redundant at the moment for Victorians, they’re like star signs, you know the names of them all, but they don’t have any actual impact on your life."

And like star signs, the names are the same but they have changed the dates.

Wonder if Buckley will claim his players "misconstrued" his instructions to win.

Black and White

Aug 03, 2020

Wonder if Eddie will let Port wear their Black and White stripes on Grand Final Day

These Blues are killing me!

Aug 03, 2020

Titus, brilliant writing as usual. But, as a resident of Covid-free Far North Qld your statement that "Days are redundant at the moment for Victorians, they’re like star signs, you know the names of them all, but they don’t have any actual impact on your life," is only feeding my schadenfreude. Which is not good as it could lead to complacency when there is a real risk of Covid-19 turning up on the next plane or in the next campervan.

peter lake

Aug 03, 2020

This footy is really an expensive game. Yet again this year I forked out $900 hard earned dollars for my Collingwood membership (some people never learn) and now after watching last nights one sided game I've had to by a new T.V. I will attempt to sell the old one on eBay but I should probably remove my boot from the shattered screen. Not a good look when one is attempting a sale.

Artistic spectrum

Aug 03, 2020

How about putting a one off payment option rather than signing up to a lifetime of renewals?

brett f sutterby

Aug 03, 2020

HI Titus Im on the verge of signing up till I read your very last para:

On a final note, hang in there Victorians, as a Melbourne supporter, I can tell you, no matter how low things get, things always turnaround.

Like you I was punished for life to join the red and blue and I cant find a turnaround.

Wednesday night may well involve storming the palace!

The Power from Port

Aug 03, 2020

We can leave the house, we've trolled Eddie all year (and rightly so bit to be fair, everyone should) and the Crows are such a shambles it’s definitely exceeded the wildest dreams of this Port Adelaide supporter.

Bob

Aug 03, 2020

You made me and my partner laugh — star signs! Can you do more astrology jokes?

Dave

Aug 07, 2020

loved the star sign analogy! great stuff

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