A column every day, as we get more football than we even asked for.

Occasionally, this column will even mention football but rarely sensibly.

Last Night

Richmond (56) v Fremantle (29)

Before we start on the game, if you’ll indulge me, I’m very happy to announce my new book Cheat: The Not-so-subtle Art of Conning Your Way to Sporting Glory is now available for pre-order and will be released November 3.

It’s a trip through the wonderful world of cheating in sport and I was not short of stories.

This was a really fun book to write because so many of the stories are both hilarious and flat out bonkers.

It’s amazing what people will do to win. You can pre-order it now and as a bonus help support me in these difficult times.

As for this game, it’s hardly one to write home about. It happened, nothing that exciting occurred and it was perfectly fine to have on in the background while travelling around the Information Superhighway.

Fremantle had obviously decided that if you can’t beat them, make it super frustrating for them and ensure they don’t beat you by too much.

This approach certainly did annoy Richmond, who looked tired after a lot of games in a short period of time and found the Dockers attention about as welcome as a charity mugger approaching you in the street.

Remember when that used to happen? What I’d give to be able to ignore them again.

Richmond will just be happy they got the job done, it wasn’t pretty, but it’s done now, and they can never think about it again because no one else will.

Today

Sydney v Melbourne (Cazaly’s Stadium) 4:40 pm Foxtel

This game takes us to Cairns which I would give a lot to be in right now. I’d give a lot to be anywhere but Melbourne right now actually.

This is one of those games Melbourne has to win and should win, hence every Demons fan is absolutely terrified of this game.

Whenever I hear our destiny is in our own hands, I start to panic.

I don’t really believe in destiny, some greater force controlling us, unless of course, you mean the AFL.

Melbourne loses Michael Hibbard to injury but on the plus side, Mitch Hannan has been omitted.

As for the Swans, their painful season is at least approaching the endpoint, but they always give it a go, which worries me.

Why can’t they just give up when things are hopeless?

I mean, I give up when things are mildly annoying, but that might explain why I have achieved very little, while the Swans makes finals almost all the time.

That’s my big worry in life. That trying is what makes the difference, not destiny and that exhausts me.

I’m tipping Melbourne, just to really hurt myself.

Greater Western Sydney v Carlton (Metricon) 7:10 pm Seven

The Giants this week extended Leon Cameron’s contract for another two years, a vote of confidence in the coach that not everyone would agree with.

It’s true that Cameron did get his team to almost play in a Grand Final, but others would question if he’s got enough out of a team so full of talent it at times seems to weight them down.

Despite an at times horror year, the Giants still have a chance to make finals, and getting to play Carlton will cheer them up immensely.

The Blues still have the ability to turn in performances crafted to destroy the souls of Carlton fans, their performance against Collingwood being a perfect example.

It’s been a very disappointing season, and normally you’d say ‘There’s always next year’ but I’m no longer sure that’s true.

The Blues have been smashed by the Giants in their last two clashes and I can’t see it being that different in this.

At the moment I’m barely able to work, so you can help support me in producing this ridiculous nonsense I churn out on a regular basis. It’s greatly appreciated. Find out more here: https://titusoreily.com/support-titus