Sep 04, 2021
Carlton announces winner of The Voice will coach club
Carlton President Luke Sayers has announced the club has settled on the process for selecting their next coach, the winner of Channel Seven’s The Voice.
Sayers said the club’s attempt to put in place a process to select the next coach ‘hadn’t worked', so the Blues will simply use some else’s pre-existing process.
“Sometimes, you have to admit that process isn’t really something you’re good at.”
“We tried, but you know, I just can’t help myself and I found myself secretly contacting coach after coach like some twenty-year-old sliding into everyone’s DMs as if their life depended on it.”
The new Carlton President said the decision was made after the discovery that his idea of building chairs that could turn around for blind auditions would come out of Carlton’s soft cap.
AFL legend Leigh Matthews welcomed the change, saying it was the most sensible approach to selecting a coach the Blues had put in place for more than two decades.
“I’ve frankly got more faith in Keith Urban, Guy Sebastian, Jessica Mauboy and Rita Ora selecting a good AFL coach than the current board.”
“Any one of the remaining contestants can’t do any worse than the last six coaches.”
The Voice contestant Bella Taylor-Smith said the chance to coach Carlton was ‘a nightmare come true’ and said she had now set her sights on coming second.
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