The Monday Knee Jerk Reaction: AFL Finals Week Two | Titus O'Reily

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The Monday Knee Jerk Reaction: AFL Finals Week Two

Footy is a passion, not some cold hearted, spread sheet dominated rational exercise.

On a Monday, you want irrational reaction. You want emotion to trump reason.

What you really want is idiotic hysteria.

You’ve come to the right place.

Geelong (98) v Sydney (39)

If the season was the original Star Wars trilogy (before George Lucas tinkered with them), then these finals are those horrendous prequels.

The only thing interesting about this game was the complete surprise the result turned out to be.

It certainly wasn’t looking good for Geelong before the game. Not only was their record against the Swans poor, but Tom Lonergan was a late out due to food poisoning.

Apparently, it was a dodgy sausage roll that did the damage. That sausage roll was the only thing to stop a Cats player on the night.

Luckily for the Cats, key forward Harry Taylor managed to make an impressive debut in defence. They should consider playing him as a defender more often, he’s a natural.

To replace him up forward, Chris Scott pulled off the greatest tactical manoeuvre since 1805, when Napoleon tempted the Austro-Russian force to attack him on his right, overextending them.

Or maybe it was just a relatively obvious move, and the media get a bit carried away sometimes.

In many ways, tactics were irrelevant as the Swans came out flat and went downhill from there.

The Cats were like a SWAT team that turns up to a house expecting a tough raid only to find the door open and the targets all lying on the floor with their hands behind their backs.

What went wrong for the Swans? The simple answer is everything.

They were second to the ball, missed shots when they had them and seemed not to be willing to do the tough stuff. It was like they went back to their game plan from the first six rounds.

Perhaps they had just been ‘up’ too long. I’ve heard that can be a problem, although I have no experience of that myself.

In the end, the Swans will be left to rue what might have been, while the Cats get to head off to Adelaide, where rumour has, it a young Patrick Dangerfield once plied his trade.

Greater Western Sydney (125) v West Coast (58)

Congrats if you were one of the few who watched to the end of this. So boring was this game that I even briefly considered watching the Wallabies instead.

Luckily for the AFL, almost no one saw this, which is probably for the best.

Only 14,865 rocked up to the game, which is the lowest VFL/AFL finals crowd since 1916.

Giants fans hate it when you mock them over the size of the crowds they get, I should know, I had all of them on a conference call whinging to me about it last night.

Welcome to the AFL Giants fans, where every team gets criticised by opposing fans for any perceived weakness, it doesn’t even matter if it’s true (which in this case it is).

North are broke, Pies fans criminals, Melbourne fans rich inbred idiots, Crows fans eat apricot slice and drink chardonnay and Dockers supporters suffer from an inferiority complex so severe it usually causes someone to end up working in ‘adult entertainment’.  

Like the crowd, the Eagles also didn’t show up. Perhaps it was the cross-country travel, the long game last week or just the fact they’re not that good, but the Eagles were awful.

So awful in fact, that Stevie J booted six, recognising pretty quickly that no one was playing on him.

If the first two weeks of finals have proven anything, it’s that the last thing we need is a wildcard round. Imagine diluting these finals even more.

What was sad was seeing Eagles’ Legends Drew Petrie, and Sam Mitchell bow out at the end. West Coast fans will be sad to see them go after all they’ve done for the club. Matthew Priddis also played his last game.

It’s going to be interesting seeing how the Giants handle playing in front of people next week. Especially a group of hostile people.

My advice to Leon Cameron is to train at IKEA this week, to simulate being surrounded by frustrated, angry people.

You can help support me in producing this ridiculous nonsense I churn out on a regular basis. My aim is to keep as much of my stuff on this site and available to everyone and not behind paywalls. Find out more here: https://titusoreily.com/support-titus

Comments

Michelle 18 September 2017

Ok so would people prefer a good home and away season and shit ginals or great finals and a dull home and away season? These finals suck but it's only five weeks so I'd prefer the main draw be interesting.

Olly 18 September 2017

*Its only 4 weeks of finals. Which thank god it is, as i probably couldn't endure 5 weeks of this:)

Michelle 18 September 2017

Will people talk about danger vs the crows or delidio vs the tigers more?

John 18 September 2017

Only if there are not any players with a basketball background

Paul 18 September 2017

The BIG difference is that Delidio is dead to us whereas the Crows are still wiping away tears.....

Frank 18 September 2017

The big question, shouting out to be answered, in this weekend's Cats V Crows game is how many times will the commentators raise that Paddy Dangerfield was a former Adelaide player ? Basil's a shoe in for a dozen on his own....

maftek 18 September 2017

Basil will probably mention Fyfe half a dozen times as well - and Freo didn't even make the finals

Wayne 19 September 2017

Surely a drinking game should be developed for this and other obvious commentary remarks

TonyS 18 September 2017

"What was sad was seeing Eagles’ Legends Drew Petrie, and Sam Mitchell bow out at the end. West Coast fans will be sad to see them go after all they’ve done for the club. Matthew Priddis also played his last game"
Very funny indeed

BarryBarry 18 September 2017

I have been waiting for a comment referencing the Battle of Austerlitz. Until now it has been a major weakness in this weekly round-up. No doubt a reference to Nelson and a bold frontal assault also in 1805 will be next.

Mark 18 September 2017

Blast ..... 2nd responder!!!
And that sums up my WCE finals weekend where the people selling dodgy sausage rolls were ahead in the game before the uninvited Eagles. Hurray to Priddis, Mitchell, Petrie and Vardy too. Well, you're gonna have to include Vardy after Nic Nat and that other lumbering giant return to fitness and 2018 ahead of Vardy in the ruck queue. Valiant at the end and woeful at the beginning.... Vardy that is.
WCE were woeful for 16 weeks this year....they need time-shifters or some Doo-dad to tell them when the season starts (March) and finishes (Oct) whereas Freo its traditionally Jan through to May....most people call them diarists. Catchy, no?
Keep up the good work Titus. You're the only thing getting us through September now!!! No pressure, but....!

Simon 18 September 2017

Wow 14,865 people turned up to the heartland of footy, these sort of numbers will have the NRL shaking in their boots.

Simon 18 September 2017

Wow 14,865 people turned up to the heartland of footy, these sort of numbers will have the NRL shaking in their boots.

Andrew Payze 18 September 2017

No doubt Sydney were bad, but I don't believe Geelong were that good; therefore I'm tipping the Crows by 35.

Faye 18 September 2017

Did you watch the game????

Wendy 18 September 2017

As a Swans fan could not endure watching after the third quarter -
I decided that John Longmire had found a set of look-alike substitutes.
Geelong, that had looked so inept the previous week, were suddenly playing like Sydney when they are/were on form. Strange times.

Hughesy 18 September 2017

Ikea, Richmond. Not a bad idea Titus.

Jane 18 September 2017

Last year Giants vs Doggies at Spotless the place was packed. I'm blaming WCE for the small crowd. The Orange Army was in full voice!

Janice 19 September 2017

Yes, Dogs v GWS last year was packed - with Dog supporters! Don't let the crowd colour fool you, their seats are orange! If ya can get hold of the game tape, have a listen to the crowd volume for each team.

Laurie Brennan 18 September 2017

The wisecracks come as a Giant release of wind from the East. I'll take it as a sigh of relief -- Eagle Eye

Laurie Brennan 18 September 2017

The wisecracks come as a Giant release of wind from the East. I'll take it as a sigh of relief -- Eagle Eye

saywat 18 September 2017

U make me fart

Miss Jane 18 September 2017

I enjoyed reading this more than I enjoyed watching either of those finals... Titus to the AFL's rescue ;)

Kathy Mason 18 September 2017

Give Tasmanian their own AFL team, crowds turn up down here, even when there are multiple popular sports being held. One team is enough for New South Wales and Queensland.

Frosty 19 September 2017

Shift one of them to Tasmania and the other one to Canberra, where they always get a full house. AFL missed the boat with Australian Rules in the ACT. All those public servants based in Melbourne shifted to Canberra when Menzies decided the Govt had to take seriously the idea of a national capital. Unfortunately, the VFL/AFL didn't take advantage of the market that had been created for them.

Margaret 18 September 2017

Margaret; Cathy Mason has hit the nail on the head!

Bloke from the outer 18 September 2017

Sorry Margaret and Cathy, Vlad the Impaler decreed that there would be two teams north and the AFL could keep milking the cash cow that is Tasmania. We pay for the 'privilege' of having games played here while the AFL blows good money after bad on GWS and GCS. Something about a fist full of $20 notes and a brothel is how the AFL runs its comp.

Then again they could get KPMG to do another million dollar consultancy report to tell them that they need more music at games; you wouldn't the supporters actually talking now would you.

Knackers 18 September 2017

Hopefully Dangerfield doesn't succumb to the gastro bug at Geelong or we'll see the debut of Channel 7 toilet cam.

Bombers 2018 18 September 2017

I can't work out how Sydney could thrash Essendon so convincingly and then get walloped by the Cats. I reckon they were on drugs or something last week. Just a hunch.

Boatster 19 September 2017

@simon actually those crowd numbers arent far off the NRL. Only 15k showed up for Manly v Penrith in week 1 of the finals ... And that was two Sydney teams.

MALCOLM & LUCY 20 September 2017

I am lying on the floor (not with my grandchild thankfully) and awaiting a SWAT Team, I'm rather busy so if you would kindly advise of when we (M&L) should expect them., this would be greatly appreciated.

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